I've never watched the world series, I've never cared and only watched a handful of baseball games ever. When I have gone to games I go to attend with family. My mothers family is from Denver and once or so a year I'd see a game there, this was fun while the rockies were new. When I first started watching the rockies everything had a huge bit of excitement to it. I didn't realize then how close the games I watched at Coors stadium were to the inception of the rockies themselves. I don't remember seeing the rockies win, I went to a game where they did win, the rockies played the cubs and for seven innings they were pummeled on, the score was something like 14 -1 cubs killing upon the rockies. So we left, the rockies then came back to win it in the 8th and 9th innings. If I'd stayed my endearment might have grown, my attachment and rockies faith would have increased. The rockies then made me sick.
I quit watching and I quit having an opinion, its painful to have an opinion when your team can't win. Most of a year ago I married into a family of red sox fans, I'm a fan. They are good, they have 2004 to beam about, they have their crazy legacy of 80 years of discouragement. To lose for 80 years and still play that takes something. Pretty happy when I watched the red sox beat the indians, fantastic work, good show, whats next?
The rockies and the red sox? nah? wuh? the australian ice rockies? the salt lake buzz had gone into the major leagues? the stones would show up to play the national anthem?
Maybe I had taken up drinking , coors stadium? Watching the rockie fans at their own home stadium seemed all so familiar. With only spots of excitement, occasional rallies by the crowd these fans know how to lose.
I'm really sad to say it, sad to talk about it, maybe next year I'll try and pay better attention, keep my ears peeled and watch for those fantastic 31 game winning streaks. Still waiting to see the rockies win.

so I'm guessing my last post was a little off, comparing Ritalin to amps is quite a step up.  I guess I just see that adding that extra bit of awareness is really painful to my body, where I haven't been sick in 3 years (nothing to bring me down) in the past month of medication thats all changed, my body is less immune because its tired.  Maybe I can see it this way... If my mind is more awake but my body is tired, maybe I can see this as my mind controlling the energy stores rather than my body.  Sounds like a good trade to me.

My wife started a website this week, http://bodleian.mysite.com/

I am here to testify, to preach, to expound, to explain to you what keeps me awake, what keeps the synapses in my brain firing? What might you ask could be this fire? For some adrenaline fuels their existance, for many caffeine drives their success, there are those at the extreme who purchase hard drugs to keep their synapses alive. Am I guilty of this? Not at all, I own a prescription, my doctor requires I check in every 30 days. What is the real difference between my Ritalin and amphetamines? Insurance, I am so tired, I fail. If I'd been exposed to amps before Ritalin who would say I wouldn't self medicate, I know I would love the feeling of staying awake... I love nothing more than staying awake. I do everything I can to get 8 hours of sleep because I want the rest of my time to be spent alert.